What is dissociation?
Dissociation is a sensation of disconnect from your senses, thoughts, emotions, identity, or memories. Although it is a term often associated with trauma, most people experience it mildly. For example, it is the feeling of "being on autopilot" while driving down a familiar route or daydreaming in a class or meeting.
Symptoms of dissociation
People experience dissociation on a broad spectrum, from mild to severe forms.
Mild forms
At the mildest end, you may feel a dissociation from the world around you. Often, this manifests as difficulty concentrating on the present or fully engaging with your surroundings and situations.
You may also feel disconnected from your own emotions, which can lead to a feeling of emptiness or lack of existence, similar to the emotional fatigue associated with depression. Similarly, you might feel a similar detachment from your body, making it hard to connect with its signals and what they are trying to communicate. Some survivors have described these feelings as living behind a glass panel that separates them from the rest of the world.
Severe forms
At more severe levels, dissociation can significantly affect your daily functioning. For example, you may dissociate more frequently, for longer periods, or with greater intensity, leading to "losing time," or being unable to remember much of your day.
This can lead to what is known as depersonalization, the sensation of being detached from your own body and thoughts, as if you are observing yourself from a third-person perspective. This type of dissociation aligns with what many survivors of sexual abuse have described as out-of-body experiences, where they felt themselves floating outside of their body.
While dissociating during childhood trauma was a vital way to protect yourself, dissociating in adulthood can cause unwanted disruptions in your life, affecting your work, relationships, and well-being. If you believe that dissociation is impacting your life, it’s crucial to seek professional help, as it may be related to other conditions such as depression, anxiety, or PTSD.
The connection between dissociation and childhood trauma
Dissociation is one of the most common long-term effects of childhood trauma. In fact, it is believed that childhood trauma is the primary cause in at least 90% of those who experience it.
This is due to the helplessness a child feels during trauma. Without an option to fight or flee, the brain resorts to dissociation as a self-protection strategy. Dissociation served a vital function: it kept you alive by creating a temporary distance between your mind and a situation that otherwise would have been unbearable.
Your brain, which was still developing, learned to dissociate during those traumatic moments and has continued to do so, even when the danger no longer exists. The brain is not fully aware of this shift and may resort to dissociation in moments of stress to continue protecting you. However, this automatic response can interfere with your daily life as an adult, affecting your relationships, work, sexual intimacy, and your connection to your own thoughts and emotions.
